Why do I “need” to control things around me?

How many times we hold tight to not let go of control? How many times are we afraid of “failing” again? How many times we refuse to get out of our comfort zone because of that same feeling = FEAR that is stopping us to go further?

Yesterday, my mom called and she asked “are you ok?”, out of nowhere… I was having oatmeal at a coffee place (and for those who know me, I LOVE oatmeal, so I was doing great!) She started telling me about a dream that she had that night. Basically in her dream I had a tooth infection that was lethal and that I was either had too much pain and die because of this intense pain or I was going to receive a lethal injection.

I’m not trying to be dramatic and illustrate my “need of control” with the “tooth infection”… But in a way it relates, it’s painful and annoying, and believe it or not, in a spiritually way it can be lethal.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight”

Proverbs 3:5-6

How would we be able to trust in God with all our heart if we’re not letting go of control? Is it better to lean on our own understanding and hold tight to what WE think is better for us rather than what HE thinks? Is it possible to submit to HIM and at the same time keep TRYING to control everything around us?

The best is yet to come

It sounds tricky, hard, difficult, like it’s going to be a long process… BUT it’s not. God WANTS to make our paths straight, He WANTS to lead us, He WANTS to show us the way. He is just waiting for open hands that would allow HIM to do what only HE can do.

For me, 2019 is the year of trusting God with all my heart, to allow HIM to touch those areas where I always thought I NEEDED to control, is the year of letting go, and as I let go, is the year of walking into that path, where God always wanted to go.

My prayer for 2019 is that we would TRUST God like never before, that we would hold HIS hand and walk with HIM, that HE will lead us through that straight path that would take us where He wants us to go. I pray for complete healing of the “need” to control everything around us, for complete freedom in knowing that His ways are better than our ways. I pray for a deeper understanding that He is a Good Father and that He is faithful, He would not let us down.

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